Sharpshooter

The plotting is slow, even slower when I realised I needed a fully realised world in which to put my story. The Motorhead tunes help and I’m getting there. I have the first three parts of the story planned I just need to see how much more I need to conclude the first instalment. I also need to rewrite the outlines so they fit the world. I’m in no rush as long as I’m doing it.

Perfect North.

I keep getting reminders of north and I keep imagining a perfect one.

Only crazy days left
and I have deaf ears
that hear too much.

Wait & See

I live for these weeks
alone with my vices
my only struggles are anticipation
and the paranoic imagination
of a pessimist
home is all about dreaming
reality is about having faith
and finding patience

With one thought in mind
everything, no matter its importance
is a distraction
a snack to tide you over
until hunger can be satisfied
I keep busy and wait
for a word or sign
and indulge in the frivolity holidays entail

Pleasant Tenses

Pleasant tenses
with the uninterrupted solitude
I’ve always craved, but never quite had

I try to live
in pleasant tenses
but I only had snap shots to cherish

The third time charm
I have the quiet life I want
just empty time to fill as I wish

Promises promises

I’ll be adding 3 maybe 4 pieces tomorrow. The birthday thing and a couple others.

A Dream I Have

Smiles
at the history I’ve made here
I’d like to make more

The Dance

A near month block has been the plaguing me since I completed And Never Let Go. Second guessing, the inability to find the right inspiration or to be able to use things I found inspiring creatively, have frustrated like all fuck. Slow it came back when trying to write about the past year as a whole, but then hit a wall.

Out of no where listening to a short piece of music I began singing anything that came into my head but following the tune of the instrumental.  30 minutes later I had 3 pages of notes and I found myself replaying that one bit of music over and over while dancing in the back yard like a loony.

It’s near complete, all the words are written I just have to tighten it up a little and make sure everything is in the right order. It won’t be up untill the 27th of August though as its become my second annual birthday piece.

And Never Let Go

The shadows are me
this torch is for you
take all my darkness but leave me some room
I’ll never, never disappear
keep shinin on me you know I’ll be happier here

I swam in the ocean
you were the harpoon
right through my heart
with plenty of room
you hooked me, and never let go
you don’t reel me in so I’ll have to swim to your boat

I’m the cold iron striking
when its too late
the dishwashers full
when I come with my plate
I don’t have, all the time in the world
I only live once, so I better start makin some moves

There is a condition
won’t allow me to wait
there is a wall thats
too hard to scale
being impulsive, can be a virtue
no dipping your toes in, jump until your soaked to the bone

You are the one
whose between every line
and on any canvas
you would be the art
I’m in the foreground, trying to catch up
by saying yes, you’ve put me in the middle of the frame

Fourteen Days

Outside the train station
carrying a bag of sadness
I say I’ll come back

She nods and says okay
but the way she looks at me
is hopeful disbelief

Leaving the airport
no smoking signs surround me
I’m back in Brisbane

I have
to wait till Monday
to see her again
anticipation builds

At the pub for second drinks
theres a familiar face
whose lost his dearest thing

His heart is in his glass
reminiscing of the past
are they truly at an end?

His loss spans the oceans
I cannot fathom it
or reach out to him

Befriending
a German who tests
my trust in strangers
she became my new sister

In the Valley I’m misplaced
she’s running late
I’m pointed toward Chinatown

Finally face to face
dinner in a quiet space
we talk of everything

Eye contact is constant
neither of us can stop smiling
or eating each others food

We discover
an inability to read
the opposite sex
and say what we feel

On the riverbank its raining
jumping on the CityCat
tie whipping in the wind

Back at the hostel hoping
to write in peace and silence
at the table people gravitate

Despite my best efforts
I can never be alone here
I’m happy for diversions

Relaxed
in the company of strangers
we share no history
bonds form easily

We meet by Casablancas
sharing some Thai food
my God shes beautiful

Sharing silly jokes
missing the punchlines
I’m lost in her eyes

Walls still hold us back
no one takes the plunge
we’re still not there

I never
wanted it to end
because I’m never sure
when I’ll see her again

Can’t get myself together
too much uncertainty
where do I go from here?

The days are mine alone
walking the city streets
replaying the evening

Was there an opening
a way to open up the door?
I’m never quite sure

Gambling
isn’t in my blood
I hold the die too tightly
and rarely let them roll

Construction sounds are close
I put on my headphones
the batteries gone flat

Next day the sounds are closer
drifting off to music
a hole opens up near my head

Covered in plaster dust
screaming at the jackhammer
in my underwear

A man
lost inside a book
on his last day in the country
I offer him a victory

The merry band of backpackers
help me win the quiz night
we celebrate like vikings

Stumbling upon the plans
to build a makeshift boat
and sail in the river

Leaving the land rover
stealing parts that we need
heart pounding at the thievery

Too lazy
we never built that boat
but we all joined forces
and got pissed in the park

Everyone else backs out
I’m feeling drunk and fearless
putting on a pink dress

Singing at karaoke
dress riding up above my hips
the photographs are everywhere

We leave for another place
not bothering to get changed
oblivious to stares

A guy
who doesn’t hear no
tried his luck with me
he’s lucky he went unscathed

Friday night I’m nervous
I leave the shirt and tie
walking to the West End

In a Greek resturant
we make each other laugh
the tables been long cleared

Listening to my adventures
and my love for her town
she asks, why don’t I move here?

To have
A brand new start
get away from Melbourne
and come here to stay

A rugby game is playing
stuck on the William Jolly
I tell her I’ll be back

A final look in each others eyes
saying our goodbyes
theres hope no disbelief

Hope is always there
no need to despair
in the pub I wanna celebrate

The last night
I party with the band
making it harder not to stay
right here in Brisbane

In the cold morning
having my last cigarette
whilst admiring the view

Theres unfinished business
and I’m outta time
I need longer than two weeks

The decision has been made
to join my new sister
and move to a town I call Bane

It was hard
to accept I couldn’t stay
but as the days keep passing
I know I’ll see her again